For life my brotha...

Our office meets 'The Office'

2012-01-26T11:30:00.000-08:00

i have had a lot of time at work the last 2 days to get some extra things done around the office.

one of those things involved choosing a character from 'The Office' to represent each person in our own office.

the results are as follows:

Kristin - Robert California

Me - Andy

Debora - Pam

Alyse - Kelly

Mike - Darryl

Dan - Michael Scott

Clay - Creed

Anders - Ryan

John Kent - Toby

Sarah - Erin

Kelsey - Angela

Shannon - TBD

yes, every other office has also done this. but it was fun. and it helped the time pass.

2012-01-25T23:20:00.000-08:00

this crazy lady is now a sister missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

i am so proud of her. she will do beyond amazing things in this place.

that would be portugal, by the way, for all you non-geographers.

just kidding.

she is an amazing woman. i will miss her very much. and not just because she is the beeziest beez and the best satanic mistress of satan hell has ever seen. she is the only one who ever made me feel like i wasn't too innapropriate, or having too much fun.

see ya in 18 months ya man in a woman's body.

i love ya.

2012-01-13T13:41:00.000-08:00

i love my jams.

if i'm at work, or walking to/around/away from campus, or driving, or doing homework, having the tunes on makes everything 110% better.

lately, i have been enjoying the following:

Somebody That I Used to Know - Gotye

Broken - Seether

Many of Horror - Biffy Clyro

Ghost on the Dance Floor - Blink 182

Poison & Wine - The Civil Wars

Safe and Sound - Taylor Swift featuring The Civil Wars

Not Over You - Gavin DeGraw

and that's about all that's new.

also school started. i like my classes. i don't mind the homework. i have been going to the gym like i used to, and yup, i'm addicted again. but, i need to eat better if i want it to really show.

year 3 is done

2011-12-15T20:14:00.000-08:00

i am sitting here having finished my last final, and having finished my third year of school, and, of course, i'm pondering.

i have two semesters of school left. the great adventure of me going to college will actually come to an end. i have had probably the best time of my life these last three years. not all of it has been rosy, but most of it has. stress, planning, papers, essays, typing, lectures, reading, highlighting, time in the library, caffeine, all night homework sessions, the broad range of subjects i have studied, the wonderful roommates i have lived with, the jobs i have been able to work at and a gazillion other things have contributed nicely to my time here at college. and i look forward to what i will get to further enjoy with these last two semesters that await.

here is the kicker. among all the experiences and learnings, my love for human beings/people/brothers/sisters/friends is the pinnacle of my experience. when i am done, i will think some about my academic accomplishments (the testing center telling me things like 'Good job!' after taking tests, getting an 'A' on my first ever article review), but what i think about more are my loved ones; my friends.

i don't remember what i studied, but i do remember studying with my friends. i don't remember what i wrote during those all nighters, but i do remember writing those papers in the company of my roommates, my brothers. i don't remember what i stressed about, but i a remember venting to and with my friends. i remember the Theatre Thursdays, the hot tub nights, the longboard sessions, the summer road trips, the double dates, the dinner parties, the bonfires, the snuggling, Da Crib, blue wall paper, laughing, the piss and moaning, joking, teasing and the fun. i remember my time spent with amazing people.

i think it is appropriate, then, that i have chosen a major devoted to studying people, culture, population, migration, economics, geopolitics and interaction. i can safely say that i have reached a point that no matter where i go, or what i do, the people i go with and the people i do with will be what makes the journey worthwhile.

i think it is important for all of us to remember that we are here, living on this earth, to be there for one another. no matter what we do, we live to love and experience with each other. not make money, not gain fame, not gain worldly honor, not gain status, not gain title. we live to live for and live among others. if we forget that, then we forgot so much; we, essentially, forget everything.

remember who you are; remember you are more than what you have become. and remember each other.

i hope you're having the time of your life, cause i am

2011-12-11T22:25:00.000-08:00

my bibles for the next couple of days. i will be taking tests in the order these books are stacked top to bottom

this is the concoction i will be drinking in large amounts while i am enslaved to the wonderful taskmasters known as finals.

but, it is all worth it. why? because this is the ever growing list of fun that awaits me when i am done with finals and home in vale.

also, knowing that i have two semesters left before i can GO TO GRADUATE SCHOOL AND GET MY DOCTORATE IN GEOGRAPHY AND BE KNOWN AS DR. ANDERSON IN A COUPLE OF YEARS IS AN AMAZING THOUGHT!!

holy cow. when did i get so big?

lisa

2011-12-02T12:39:00.000-08:00

today my mom and dad took my dog lisa to the vet to put her asleep.

i got to spend some time with her during thanksgiving. we have had her for 13 years. it was definitely her time to go; she was having a hard time doing normal dog things, and she was getting a little delirious.

she will be missed. but now she can go chase birds in heaven with our other dogs.

shes the one on the right.

still

2011-11-19T09:58:00.000-08:00

i am supposed to study and take a test today, and then finish my thesis about why women get tattoos. but. i. cannot. sit. still.

how can i? thanksgiving break is almost here! and jessica's awesome birthday party is tonight. and bo is recording new music as i write this. and i cannot wait to get home and see my family, and my cats, and my dogs, and go hunting, and drive my red truck, and see some old friends, and hang out with new ones. and a ton more.

i need some good tunes to help me focus. and lots of praying that i can focus. like i may have to sacrifice some puppies in order to be able to focus to really show the focus gods i mean business.

mountain dew what?

2011-10-26T21:12:00.000-07:00

i was driving around tonight and was thinking about some stuff, just like i do ALL the time. there was this guy walking by himself, probably from the gym after playing some basketball because he was carrying one, on the way back to his dorm, and it made me think.

i really hope he is going home to an apartment full of roommates that he can laugh with and joke with and be rowdy with. i hope he isn't finding adjusting to byu too hard. i hope he will be able, if he hasn't already, to find a niche and be able to make his freshmen year of college a memorable one full of awesome experiences and good times.

i hope all these things for that person i have never met or will ever talk to because i know how it feels to be him. i know what it is like to come home to an empty apartment, or to an apartment that you do not fit in with. i know how EXTREMELY hard it is to fit in at byu. and how hard it is to find a niche, and to make freshmen year an awesome experience. luckily i had 1 and 1/2 chances at a freshmen year thanks to my job as an RA.

then it got me thinking about some other stuff, like how there are problems in this world that are way bigger than having a great freshmen year at college. i remembered about how there is a lot of hurt and heartache in this world. i can remember flying over las vegas on my way to boise for my brother's graduation and looking down at all the houses below. all those houses represented gobs and gobs of people. and all those people have good and bad in their lives. some have more bad than good. and that isn't fair. i remember thinking i just wished i could fix it all for all those people, those mommas, and children, and dads, and lonely old people, and lost people, all of them; but i can't. first, it is impossible for me to do that. and second, it isn't my place. that fixing is Someone Else's responsibility, not mine.

but i know that i do have people in my sphere of life that i can help. i can smile, and joke, and make people laugh, and listen, and make cookies and do a lot of other things for people i interact with on a daily basis. and that is where i can also feel like i am making a difference in trying to change all of the hurt that exists in this world. so i will just keep doing that.

baking cookies is way easier than trying to fix an entire human race anyway.

2011-10-26T21:01:00.000-07:00

i home teach some great guys. and gals.

tonight i taught the guys cause i am going to be gone this weekend; tyson will visit the chicas on sunday.

we talked about how looking up when life gets hard is really the only way to live. i asked them what they do when they dont feel like looking up, and brett told me that we just have to have the attitude of 'come what may, and love it.' pretty great advice.

i am very grateful for these guys and their examples and their advice. they have a lot more on their plate and have had experiences i wouldn't know how to handle. they are rock solid, and i hope someday i can be as solid as they are.

2011-10-25T17:05:00.000-07:00

two things i thought of while watching american horror story:

a - i am racist against gingers. in the opening scene two ginger boy twins walk into this house and as soon as they are on screen i am just like, 'ginger; ew.' no offense. not all gingers make me think this. my thoughts against the two probably had something to do with the fact that they were really mean towards a little girl with down syndrome.

b - when i buy a house, i will look through EVERY SINGLE CORNER/ROOM/CLOSET/BASEMENT/EVERYTHING before i buy it. EVERYTHING owned by the prior tenants will be removed. unless i like what i find. i guess you can say i am a little superstitious. its fine though, because i am part indian.

2011-10-20T21:04:00.001-07:00

oh love.............

geography

2011-10-14T14:58:00.000-07:00

i feel like a part of me has come alive.

my buddy's dad told us once that we needed to become experts in our fields of study.

this semester, i feel like that is actually happening; i am becoming a full fledged geography nerd. better yet, an expert.

my mind CONSTANTLY reverts back to geographical topics. population, economy, disasters, politics, government, seasons, mountains, erosion and ANYTHING having to do with the science of space and place.

my tests score are actually good. in class i can apply geographical explanations to discussion, giving the 'why' behind situations and happenings, instead of just simple, wrote definitions.

i think my favorite thing to do is to stumble upon issues that have not been explored very deeply, ponder about what could be done to fix issues, and then find papers and solutions written by REAL experts that say the same thing i do.

i know that i will forever be a student. but for once, i feel like i can actually master something someday. i can challenge others when they are wrong. i can say to people, 'no, that's wrong, you're wrong. i'm right. see this? this paper proves i know more than you. this dissertation proves i know more than you. all these other experts who say the same thing i do proves you are wrong. so step DOWN.' just fyi, the only time i feel like i want to do this is when people open their mouths about something they have no idea about and then scoff at a people/place/situation like it means nothing to them, or when they belittle you like you know nothing when you try to add your two cents to a situation.

ANYWAYS, the main idea is this: i actually am starting to feel accomplishment from all this time i have spent being in school. i am making myself into something.

plus, fall is starting to grow on me, even if fall basically equals nasty, yucky, grey winter.

tiger bed

2011-10-12T09:37:00.000-07:00

so, i may or may not be lacking in my attendance points the last couple of weeks concerning classes..............

here is my reasoning that makes it okay:

A - i love geography, and all these classes are 100 classes, minus a few. thus, i have already read/been taught/been taught repeatedly what i am being taught in these classes.

B - i have a prospectus, a 10-15 page research article to go along with that prospectus, a 10-15 page paper about my family's migration patterns from my grandparents to me, a 5-8 page paper about the mammone phenomena in Italy, and a wee little paper about Latter-day Saint journal entries, all due by the end of next week. i think that's it......... basically, i can either work on these papers or sit in class and hear what i already know, repeatedly.

C - i can also sleep in with the window open. let me just tell you about how awesome this is. i just 'borrowed' a blanket my brother brought down with him before he left vale for logan. it is one of those fake, crushed velvet blankets that are the SOFTEST things invented. here is what i do. i put that blanket down to lay on, on top of my already ultra cushioned mattress topper, and then use my great grandma's really heavy quilt that is like three quilts in one in size, and then snuggle down with three pillows, another blanket just in case, and of course ET. who wouldn't want to enjoy this amazingness? you can understand why getting up in the morning is so difficult. oh, and i never get too hot, because the window is open. i feel like i am sleeping on top of a giant tiger. mmmmmmmmmhm.

D - spending time in logan, perhaps friday thru monday, is just way too much fun to not do.

all of these excuses are valid............. right? okay no. i am paying a lot of money to go to school, and skipping class is wasting that money. so from here on out, no more skipping class... except maybe the friday before halloween. and on EXTREME situations in the morning when my bed is ULTRA comfy.

2011-10-05T23:48:00.000-07:00

i have a giant list of to-do's i should be working on. i have a ton of homework i should be doing.

but right now i just want to listen to the rain.

i have written about rain before. i like it. a lot.

i love the way the mountains look and how the clouds make the mountains seem like they are from the lord of the rings.

i like being able to wear one of my favorite jackets to school on the days that it rains.

i love how girls get really frustrated about the rain messing up their hair.

the rain makes just about everything fresh, and closer together and everyone slows down and simplifies.

rain makes distances shrink. and grow. at the same time.

2011-09-18T10:53:00.001-07:00

well. i am 24. whoop whoop!!

2011-09-08T16:43:00.000-07:00

for a long time now i feel like i have been stranded in a waiting room at the doctor's office. can you picture it? the wooden furniture, the outdated magazines, the phone-answering-facebook-scowering-receptionist with her glasses, the smell, the toys in the corner for the kids to play with?

well. today, i finally got to actually visit the doctor. it wasn't that i had to wait my turn. it wasn't that there was a long line. and it wasn't that my insurance had to go through first. i just wasn't ready to see the doctor yet.

but, today i was finally ready to see the doctor. i was ready to see the doctor because i was ready and willing to practice what the doctor was going to tell me to do. i told the doctor, once again, what was hurting. i explained why i wanted it to stop. and he told me what i could do. it was straightforward. it wasn't nebulous. it was even through a medium i have spent loads of my life pouring over. in fact, i am POSITIVE i have heard the advice before. but, guess what. i was NOT ready to hear it, or else i would have.

i don't know what i did different, or what i changed inside. what i do know is that all i can say is wow.

2011-08-28T22:35:00.000-07:00

sitting listening to the rain i can't help but be reflective. also, i can't sleep, what with the excitement of a new day of school tomorrow. so, between the cookie and mug of milk, imma do some blogging.

i love my new ward and my new home. i have yet to live in a place that feels like home since living in rogers 93. i'm not even sure how things or places like this happen, but living in the colony is going to be amazing. so many things have already happened that make this place so good. maybe it was cause bo has already been living here, or that i have been able to make friends, or that my roommate kyle is a fellow northwesterner who loves NPR news, whatever the cause, i am very much impressed and excited to be where i am right now.

looking at my walls, i realize i have SO much art. and i love it.

i love the rain. rain is a funny element. to some it brings feelings of snuggling, cleansing, closeness and warmth. to some the rain is the time to open the windows, turn off the lights and listen to smooth jazz and fall asleep. to some the rain brings sadness and loneliness. to us all, the rain means different things at different times.

tonight... i know that the rain mirrors the feelings of a close friend. and all i want to do is help and fix. but i can't. i can only just lend my shoulders to help bear burdens, an ear to listen and prayer to send angels. knowing EXACTLY how they feel is interesting. i know i can relate, but knowing how the feelings they are feeling right now feel makes me want to fix it that much more. tomorrow will be better.

i am blessed.

2011-08-04T18:23:00.003-07:00

rain pitter pattering like fingers on pianos keys
a soft guitar pattern plucked in the background
natural notes sprinkling down and bouncing back up from the earth
slinking their glorious soft noise into the depths of my eardrums

dark clouds roll threatening loud clash above
yet swoon only with softness blanketing the land with a warmth of a comforter upon a bed
the tops of the mountains hide behind the grey mist
green erupts gradually intertwining with the granite on the steep sides

calmness envelopes the body and mind
it seems laying with the windows open doing nothing
adorned in basketball shorts and tall T's
is made totally appropriate and adequate

my car loves the rain
a free shower
the drops buzz across the windows
the water thrown up by the tires splooshes the undercarriage and carries away bits of mud

this is why i love rain
it renews
it calms
it beautifies

i am reminded of my best friend
he loves the rain and grey, too
we are under the same roof sharing the same story
not so far apart as the map says we are

that is why i love the rain, too

2011-08-04T18:23:00.001-07:00

when you say goodbye to those you love

you must do so quickly

for if you do not

you may make it too hard for them

they may cry so hard they never stop

and if you love them so

then you would rather have the hurt be in yourself

than inside of the ones you love....

um, yeah.

2011-07-09T15:18:00.000-07:00

it is amazing to me that people can be COMPLETE grouchbagturds when they are either

a} getting a picture of Jesus framed

b} asking where the garments are

c} asking for a scripture marker

seriously?

i mean, seriously?

COMPLETELY missing the point? i think so...

leafis

2011-07-05T19:22:00.001-07:00

turning over a new leaf is hard when that leaf weighs a gazillion pounds

2011-06-15T21:34:00.000-07:00

this song is grand

foo fightin

2011-06-08T22:38:00.000-07:00

this song started playing today while i was driving.

i love this song.

here are the lyrics.

I've got another confession to make
I'm your fool
Everyone's got their chains to break
Holdin' you

Were you born to resist or be abused?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Are you gone and onto someone new?
I needed somewhere to hang my head
Without your noose
You gave me something that I didn't have
But had no use
I was too weak to give in
Too strong to lose
My heart is under arrest again
But I break loose
My head is giving me life or death
But I can't choose
I swear I'll never give in
I refuse

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
You trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Oh...

Oh...Oh...Oh...Oh...

Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
The life, the love you'd die to heal
The hope that starts the broken hearts
You trust, you must
Confess

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

I've got another confession my friend
I'm no fool
I'm getting tired of starting again
Somewhere new

Were you born to resist or be abused?
I swear I'll never give in
I refuse

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Has someone taken your faith?
Its real, the pain you feel
You trust, you must
Confess
Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?
Oh...

listen

2011-06-07T21:54:00.000-07:00

This song.

And this song.

crest

2011-06-02T16:47:00.000-07:00

i live. and work. and am around mormons everyday.

but, sometimes, slash most of the time, you would never know.

the ones at work are grouchy and demanding.

the ones i talk to randomly on the street and ask questions about flowers are rude and short.

i used to wonder how you could live in utah and not be mormon cause everyone else was. now i know why. why would you wanna be like one of these grouchy ass mormons?

i think somewhere they all forgot what it is they believe in.

sick.

remember

2011-05-29T09:30:00.001-07:00

it is memorial day weekend.

i don't know if it is because of the legacy my family shares with the military, or if it is because of where and how i was raised, or if it was because i was in boy scouts. maybe it is the story my grandpa has told about vietnam. either way, the deep, influencing and reverent respect i have for those who have fought for my freedoms is immense.

veterans and current servicemen are real heroes. the wars are fought far away, and to many because of that distance those wars seem unnecessary. it would only take a few cause and effect situations to land that war right into our own backyards, though. our way of life would be attacked. our western ideals, the ideals perpetuated by the greeks that we carry forth with today, would be attacked. our family, our education, our dream to succeed, our friday night movie fests, our poker nights, our pledges, our music and our songs, our football and our baseball, our christmas lights and sugar cookies. everything we hold dear and take for granted would be sought after as fuel for a fire, as target practice.

that is what our veterans have done for us. they protect our western ideals, the ideals perpatuated by the greeks that we carry forth with today. our family, our education, our dream to succeed, our friday night movie fests, our poker nights, our pledges, our music and our songs, our football and our baseball, our christmas lights and sugar cookies. everything we hold dear and take for granted.

so remember this weekend, and tomorrow especially. watch a war movie. take action, and dont be just thankful, but be grateful and show it.

and live like they would want you to: happily, fruitfully, and fully.

thank you:

great grandpa gholson
grandpa vandeweghe
grandpa andy
brother christopher

all my other family and friends who have served and are serving

and everyone else i will never meet

thank you.

brudda

2011-05-24T20:52:00.000-07:00

my brother is graduated!! i am so excited. he has so much fun ahead of him. he is finally going to figure out what college is all about: studying, eating, studying, having too much fun, and sleep in there somewhere.

i am so proud of him!! he had a 3.9something gpa, was in honor society, president of his auto club and went to state and placed first with his team therein, was banging at golf and got to go to state in that, too, he got accepted into some great schools and got some great scholarships from those schools and did a ton more.

more importantly, he did things that really mattered. he was a friend to those who didn't have any. he spent entire saturdays with a young man with autism when no one else would. he opened our imperfect home to those who stemmed from even worse homes. he never judged those who were different, because he knew he was different himself. he painted his toenails for his graduation because he knows that taking himself too seriously is extremely overrated. and so much more.

i am just so proud to be his brother. he is pretty much legit.

go ian b.

listen

2011-05-20T01:37:00.000-07:00

i love this song.

EVERYTHING TRYING - DAMIEN JURADO

thursdee mornin

2011-05-19T07:03:00.000-07:00

couple thoughts this morning.

i am sick of seeing europe not have any balls when it comes to the affairs of the world. they are lukewarm, comfortable in their little world of baguettes, tea and secret banking. here the us pours money that we really do not have into the coffers of others, while europe sits idly by doing nothing.

there is a commercial that plays in the bookstore where this dude says it is up to byu grads to change the world. what the heck? aren't there like a million other graduates from other universities each year that can also change the world? since when are byu graduates the only good people in the world? also, i don't think byu graduates are ready to make very many changes. why? because byu grads don't know anything about the world. they have lived in a bubble for years. and even when they go on study abroad, most of the time that bubble stays intact and they are unable to get a true feel for what they witness. byu grads are just not keyed in to the realities of the world, and anytime they come close to experiencing it, they shirk away, reaching for that bubble of fake they have enjoyed while being at byu. someone save me; don't let me become like them!*

*this part of my post does have some exceptions, like my friend rochelle, and lou (she was able to marry a university of utah graduate!) and some others; i just can't think of them right now.

i LOVE annie henrie's art and want to have every piece of her collection hanging up on my walls.

the rain has been nice. i know people hate it, but if it was hot, people would complain. if it was perfectly warm, people would complain. if it was perfect, people would complain. so i am going to enjoy the rain. it reminds me of my brudda nealio who is way far away. it makes the mountains look like lord of the rings. and we didn't get a whole lot of rain in eastern oregon, so anytime it rained, we loved it, and that just continues to be so while i live in utah.

i am gonna get paid to go to salt lake today and learn how to use a v-nailer; that is a tool used to put frames together. we have one in the bookstore now, but due to lack of experience, it doesn't get used like it should. so i am excited!

tonight justina and i are hitting up gloria's little italy. and then watching a movie in the da crib. seven pounds? most likely!

i can't wait to go home. the weirdness of seeing a bunch of people hardly matters like it did last night. i get to sleep in my big bed, go to church with my mom, eat good food and go see my brother GRADUATE!! so excited.

k i gotta go to work now. bye.

what?

2011-05-18T23:54:00.001-07:00

my brother graduates high school on sunday.

today was his last day of school.

holy flippin cow.

i am so nervous to see everyone at the graduation.

invisibility cloak needed.

stat.

adele

2011-05-16T23:21:00.000-07:00

go discover adele.

momma

2011-05-08T16:33:00.000-07:00

this is my momma.

this is when she came and took care of me when i had heart surgery.

these are her boys. she loves us too much.

this is her favorite thing, her family.

i love my momma. she loves me, so deeply, in fact, i have no idea, and will not have an idea of how deep until i have kids.

i love her so much.

so. so. so. so. much.

brentan

2011-05-05T00:51:00.000-07:00

brentan.

she had a daughter. and a momma. and other family.

bleak.

my mom wants to make her german pancakes like old times.

i want to read goosebump books and drive to my grandma and grandpa's again. and a lot of other stuff.

she will be missed.

warm

2011-05-02T19:31:00.000-07:00

i went on my first run outside tonight.

it was nice.

i can't wait for better weather when i can run around at like 2 in the morning and be nice and warm.

yesm. mmmmmhm. spankings.

2011-05-01T00:04:00.000-07:00

even tho it is snowing...summatime is here. hello Summer 2011 List. Bibs and Sanchez will now spank you.

back or forth

2011-04-27T01:42:00.000-07:00

mcdonalds or stay in bed. movie or sleep. hate work or love work. happy or not. here or there. Provo or Mexico. brown or blue. covers or sheets. music or airduct noise. rearrange or keep it. do it or don't. blast.

charcoal

2011-04-18T23:43:00.001-07:00

do you know this scene from the movie '500 Days of Summer'?

basically the male character's entire world is rendered to nothing after a series of events.

he goes on a twinkie and jack daniel's binge for days.

we all have days/weeks/months/moments/years/seconds/eons when life feels that way to us.

but...we all have This.

This is a Savior. His name is Jesus Christ, Physician, Healer, Lover of our Souls, Jehovah, Lamb, Everything.

And with Him, instead of charcoal worlds that can be erased and smudged, He can give us permanent worlds in the Eternities, where hurt somehow doesn't have a place, where loneliness is lost, and loved ones are forever.

I love Him.

FINAL(s)

2011-04-18T11:56:00.000-07:00

i have three of four finals left.

i'm studying for my second one right now.

i have no idea how i am gonna make it through the last two; ADD is winning right now...

here are some things that are helping:

how people made it through finals in the decades before me without these items i have no idea.

pray for me to whatever god, gods, goddesses, etc. you pray to and i will love you forever.

mythology what?

arrayed in white

2011-04-13T16:39:00.001-07:00

forever

huzzah

2011-04-12T21:17:00.001-07:00

this semester is over tomorrow.

i made it. i made it through one summer and two semesters mostly without my bruddas.

here's to a summer, two more semesters, and a summer, and then... huzzah.

i can do this.

55 QUESTIONS

2011-04-10T18:33:00.000-07:00

*55 QUESTIONS*

Whitney Wilde, Satan’s mistress in person, told me to do this; and it was pretty fun. You should do it, too.

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? First no, middle yes
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? At the temple
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Yes
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Turkey
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? No
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Yes
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Yes
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Yes
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Cracklin’ Oat Bran; it keeps me regular. And Honey Oh’s
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? No
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? Depends
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Cookies and cream
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Smile/teeth/eyes
15. RED OR PINK? Red
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I can be grouchy
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? My bruddas
19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? I am barefoot beezy
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Tortellini
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Mutemath 'You Are Mine'
22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Ocean eye blue-green, cause that is the color of my eyes
23. FAVORITE SMELLS? …inappropriate
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Jessica
25. MOUNTAIN HIDEAWAY OR BEACH HOUSE? Beach
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Baseball and tennis
27. HAIR COLOR? Brown
28. EYE COLOR? Ocean eye blue-green
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? No
30. FAVORITE FOOD? Dr. Pepper
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Both
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Silverado
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? White
34. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer
35. HUGS OR KISSES? Anything wet…
36. FAVORITE DESSERT? Lemon cake with lemon frosting
37. STRENGTH TRAINING OR CARDIO? Weights
38. COMPUTER OR TELEVISION? Pootpoot
39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? The Promise of Discipleship; Alan Mendelsohn, The Boy From Mars; geography textbooks
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? N/A
42. FAVORITE SOUND? The sound of good times being had
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Stones
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Detroit
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Ask and you shall receive
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Oregon
47. WHERE ARE YOU LIVING NOW? Provo
48. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HOUSE? Brown
49. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR CAR? Silver
50. DO YOU LOVE SOMEONE? Yes
51. WHERE DO YOU WORK? In a frame shop
52. FAVORITE ACTIVITY? Gym/hanging out
53. FAVORITE HOLIDAY? Christmas/Halloween/St. Patty’s/Fourth of July all tie
54. FAVORITE COLOR? Brown/blue/orange
55. FAVORITE THING TO WEAR? My girlfriends’ underwear…

puff puff pass

2011-04-06T22:59:00.000-07:00

puff cheetos. dr. pepper. pb twix. green bananas. glasses. pandora. this can mean only one thing. maybe i had more homework than i thought i did, and maybe i didn't get it all done, like i thought i did. its fine, though. cause tonite is ALL NIGHTER WEDNESDEE WIF DA BOBO. MMMMMMMMMMHM. GET IT DONE.

Daria

2011-04-05T22:41:00.001-07:00

If you do not know the show 'Daria', read THIS then watch THIS and learn what true love is.

lakeside

2011-03-30T19:47:00.000-07:00

i went to this place today when i was done with my homework

it was so nice. i am all done with my homework for the semester, minus a few tweaks here and there, and finals.

the lake was the perfect way to chill out and finish a day. here at the lake ducks are actually scared of people, unlike the ones on campus. the noises are birds and fish jumping out of the water, instead of the clamor of campus and students and people.

i didn't have to worry about anything. i just got to chill and think, and not think, and call my dad and talk and do all of that.

it was just nice. i'm thinkin that more time is gonna be spent out there this summer. fo sho. fire pittin anyone?

phone is blocking my view

2011-03-28T21:33:00.000-07:00

this

'but, honestly'

2011-03-23T18:32:00.000-07:00

'But, Honestly'

Where are you off to with that head of yours?
Is there somewhere you should be?
Was it something that I said the time I held you down
and told you it's not you it's only me?

Maybe

Don't take what I don't need
(Give me back my peace of mind)
Don't say what I don't need
(Give my back my precious time)
No way you'll silence me
You'll see

What you up to now your mirror's gone?
Is there someone you should be?
Did you think I was just fooling 'round with you?

But honestly
But honestly
But honestly

Don't take what I don't need
(Give me back my peace of mind)
Don't say what I don't need
(Give me back my precious time)
No way you'll silence me
(Give me back my peace and quiet)
Nowhere to hide from me
You'll see

And tonight I thank the stars
As I count my lucky scars
For everything you've given me

And all the wants I gave to you
Something borrowed, something blue
If you want them back
I'll give it to you

Give it to you [15x]

I don't want one thing that I gave to you. [8x]

lookin round and round

2011-03-23T18:28:00.000-07:00

i know this is wrong.....................

.........................................but sometimes when i'm walking on campus i see people and think...........

...........................I hope I don't look like them............................................................................................................................

.........................................charity never faileth, but sometimes i faileth.....................................................................................................................................................................................................

brownstone 20

2011-03-21T22:00:00.000-07:00

my roommates are hilarious. i could go on, but i'm tired. they definitely earn a strong almost first place award.

grand canyon

2011-03-20T01:09:00.000-07:00

barren. but pretty.

i think before we came here to earth from heaven, this is kind of how we saw how our life would be like. we saw brown, and dry, and rocks. but what we concentrated on were the flowers, the little bits of green on the slopes, and the rays of sun breaking through the clouds, and the chance for new and the chance for adventure.

we saw barren. but we concentrated on pretty.

Mumford & Sons

2011-03-20T00:54:00.000-07:00

listen to this song (lo siento for the expletive)

Little Lion Man

then, listen to this song

The Cave

then buy this album

Mumford & Sons
Sigh No More

Shamrock

2011-03-20T00:50:00.000-07:00

I love Saint Patrick's Day.

It means party. And wearing green. And Flogging Molly. And dancing around bonfires with blue Celtic symbols painted on our bodies (but only sometimes in some settings with some people).

I hope yours was grand. Cause mine ruled.

Prometheus

2011-03-20T00:43:00.001-07:00

this is 'Prometheus' by Gustave Moreau.

allow me to tell you about prometheus. prometheus is a titan, and the titans were the gods that ruled before they were overthrown by the olympian gods, aka zeus and his brothers and sisters. prometheus and his mom sided with the olympian gods, and that is why they were not imprisoned by zeus after the titans were overthrown.

ANYWAYS, prometheus was chained to a rock by zeus because he did some naughty things such as: bringing fire to humans, teaching humans how to trick the gods into accepting the lesser part of a sacrificial animal, and knowing about a prophecy that foretold the downfall of zeus, without telling zeus about the prophecy.

i love this painting, and not just because we talked about it in mythology class.

i like it because i can relate to it, which is usually the reason why we as viewers can relate to various forms of art. i can relate to it because... sometimes i feel like prometheus. i feel like in some ways i have done my part in bringing good to the humans around me, and getting in trouble for it.

whether it was when i was an ra and got in trouble for telling my residents how to find loopholes in the housing rules, or passing on some good info to my bruddas before they eloped with a thing called a mission, it seemed like i got spanked by the fates for doing my part to help out.

after i help people, i dont expect stuff in return; that would be WAY obtuse. but, the last thing i expect to happen is to be chained to a rock and getting the lovely experience of having my liver eaten out everyday by various birds of prey. but, sometimes, that's what i feel like happens...

guess what, though. in this painting, prometheus is crushing one of the vultures under his foot. he is still chained to a rock. and a new vulture is currently eating out his rejuvenated liver. however, prometheus looks steadfastly forward, and soon he will be set free by heracles.

on the days i feel chained to a rock having my liver eaten out day after day even after i have tried to do my part in bringing good to the world, i can know that pretty soon my heracles is gonna show up and make me right.

in the mean time, imma stomp some vulture, and glare menacingly into the heavens, daring them to do their worst...

do the dew today with love

2011-03-06T10:19:00.001-08:00

eat some frenchbread and drink some dew today and spend time with the ones you love.

i love you all.

BOOM BABY

2011-03-01T16:16:00.001-08:00

so you know when you hope and wish and beg The Fates that one of your favorite movies will be on tv because you dont want to spend 8 bucks to rent it and redbox doesn't have it?

guess what.

my hoping and wishing and begging has paid off.

3:30 am, friday march 4th, Baby Boom will be on AMC, channel 38 for me on my tv. i will FO SHO be watchin.

if you haven't seen it, go here.

this was the last movie me and my mom watched before i went to detroit for two years. plus it was made in the eighties. plus it is just bomb.

The Bridge Builder

2011-02-26T11:14:00.001-08:00

This poem is by James Dalton Morrison. It is one of President Monson's favorites.

An old man, going a lone highway,
Came at the evening, cold and gray,
To a chasm, vast and deep and wide,
Through which was flowing a sullen tide.
The old man crossed in the twilight dim;
The sullen stream had no fears for him;
But he turned when safe on the other side
And built a bridge to span the tide.

“Old man,” said a fellow pilgrim near,
“You are wasting strength with building here;
Your journey will end with the ending day;
You never again must pass this way;
You have crossed the chasm, deep and wide—
Why build you the bridge at the eventide?”

The builder lifted his old gray head:
“Good friend, in the path I have come,” he said,
“There followeth after me today
A youth whose feet must pass this way.
This chasm that has been naught to me
To that fair-haired youth may a pitfall be.
He, too, must cross in the twilight dim;
Good friend, I am building the bridge for him.”

...test...

2011-02-26T10:43:00.001-08:00

when i have a test, i get antsy. and it is hard for me to study for the test. especially when it is a religion class. cause ya.

i just want to go take the test right now. but i would probably get a C. and i want an A. especially an A since our entire grade stems from two tests and class participation. bleh.

i just really wish i could know if i am prepared or if i'm psyching my self out for this test.

blast. geography please? please.

tarea

2011-02-21T15:29:00.000-08:00

i have a

MOUNTAIN

of homework i need to do.

........................................motivation what?

Movie

2011-02-19T16:22:00.000-08:00

i love this movie.

watch it if you have not. if you have, watch it again.

DragonShirt

2011-02-18T06:15:00.001-08:00

NEW BLOG. FOLLOW IT AND LAUGH.

http://thewayofthedragonshirt.blogspot.com/

Valentine's Day

2011-02-13T22:32:00.001-08:00

On the eve of VALENTINE'S DAY, I have found some pictures and videos I find intriguing and hilarious.

Look at this picture.

Apollo, a perfect god, is chasing a woman who wants nothing to do with him. So, instead of giving Apollo a chance, she wants to be turned into a tree. Hmmm...

And then there is this video (view here) about Provo Utah girls...

In this video, the girls give chase instead of the guys...

I think basically that all us single people in Provo are hopeless, hilarious and without any clue about anything as far as dating.

And that's why we just need to have fun. And when 'it' happens, 'it' happens.

In the mean time, BRING ON THE CANOODLING!!! (see definition of canoodling here, specifically definition number 2)

Profe McFarland

2011-02-02T13:13:00.001-08:00

Why I love mythology: my teacher

Why my teacher pwns:

His comb over is always messed up
He always has a bow tie
He moves around a ton
He says words like naughty
He wears his spectacles on his nose
He makes fun without making fun of people who care too much about grades
He's way behind where we need to be in class because he loves the subject and teaches us tangents that are way cool
He wants us to write about stuff that's out of the box, but wants us to do it well and with passion and feeling instead of with just enough effort to get by
And he likes our honors class better than his non-honors class

*__-B O M B D I G G I T Y-__*

Found

2011-01-26T22:42:00.000-08:00

When I'm at the gym, or doing homework, or at work making a frame, or anything that requires effort, there comes a moment in some situations when I can choose to do a little less or a little more.

I can stop at 20 minutes of cardio, and have done something, or I can do 40 and have done more of something.

I can stop reading, and goof off, or I can start learning and keep going.

I can put a frame together, or I can piece a frame together, and fix that eighth of an inch that is out of kilter.

Basically, there is a little man, a natural man, that lives inside me that says do the bare minimum. But then, something happens, and a lion, or a bear, or a Chimera (mythology class reference) roars into existence, and eats that little man.

Then I find myself where I should be; I'm going the extra mile. And it is in that extra that I find myself.

And I like what I find.

Paper

2011-01-24T11:39:00.000-08:00

I thought I could wait till the night before to write my paper for mythology.

I was wrong.

Why?

Because:

-This is the first paper I have written in a long time.
-It was a lot harder to write one for Mythology class and get an A than it was to write an A paper for my Humanities class.
-It was Sunday and I felt naughty, until midnight.
-The pending In-N-Out run was distracting me.
-And some other distractions that I'll talk about later...

But I got it D O N E. And wif true Nutta-Butta style; we're talking Will Smif levels.

This is important...

2011-01-19T16:39:00.000-08:00

I watched a movie today called 'Brothers'. In it, a Marine dies who was younger than me. That got me to thinking...

So I looked up another movie I really like called 'Taking Chance'. It was made in 2009 and portrays a young man, who is 19, who passes away in the military and his body is escorted home by the character Lt. Col. Michael Strobl. That Marine was also younger than me.

So, then I decided to look up some statistics...

According to the Washington Post website (see here)

42 - 18 year olds
333 - 19 year olds
567 - 20 year olds
687 - 21 year olds
565 - 22 year olds
442 - 23 year olds

have D I E D for you and for me in the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Those young men are my age or younger. Those men are the ages of my best friends. My little brother is that age. And my older brother is over there right now.

I have a HUGE responsibility to live my life for those young, YOUNG men. I have to live so that their lives are not wasted.

I have to live for ALL of the men and women who have died for me to be able to go to college and write blogs and have Facebook statuses and go on dates and have Christmas with my family and go on a mission to Detroit and go to church and kiss girls and have kids and get a good job and raise the next generation and everything else I do and take for granted.

Thank you is not enough. I have to live my gratitude. We all do. And I will. Forever.

Realization

2011-01-16T23:55:00.000-08:00

I am so glad when I can have what I need reaffirmed in my life. Mmmmmmmmhm.

Tube

2011-01-07T22:43:00.000-08:00

Tonight we went sledding. No. Not sledding, I lied. We went tubing. At Rock Canyon Park on the steep slopes of the legendary bowl that is Rock Canyon Park. Whitney and Kaylee hit a jump on the FIRST run of the night, caught a little air, and then we drove them to the hospital. Kaylee broke her collar bone in two places, got a bloody nose and a bump on the forehead. Whitney got a concussion and started vomiting and hurt her hand.

To say the least, it was an epic night, BUT ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE GOING TO BE FINE.

And guess what we are doing on Monday? TUBING IN THE SAME PLACE!

Epic? Yes. Blame it on Addy.

Cuss

2011-01-07T06:21:00.000-08:00

Eff word. I'm so tired.

Nutta Butta of a time

2010-12-24T06:50:00.000-08:00

So. This week I was never home. Know why? Cause I was in Lehi, with Bo, and momma and poppa Roden, and Pablo and Lou, and Neal in spirit.

What did we do? Had fun. Went to movies. Played games. Ate too much. Opened presents. Had family prayer and scripture study.

Even though I had to work, and even though I didn't get to go home till today, I have been home all week.

What is home? Home is where your heart is.

LEMME ON THAT PLANE TO BOISE. RIGHT. NOW.

What I wrote on the comments section for one of my general ed. classes...

2010-12-12T22:09:00.000-08:00

I am just VERY opposed to classes that fulfill general education requirements. Most students learn what they need for a grade, not to be spiritually strengthened, or intellectually enlarged, to build character or to try to contribute a general education class' learnings to a life full of leadership and service.

Lets just accept reality and save costs and allow students to put their efforts of fulfilling the Mission and Aims of a BYU Education towards what they really care about, their major, and the classes within that major.

Do you feel lucky

2010-12-10T23:48:00.000-08:00

It is ten minutes until 1am. It is a Friday night. I am in the library. There is only one thing this could mean...

IT IS FINALS WEEK BABY!

Who's ready for some spankings? I hope my tests are.

A hundred...

2010-12-09T22:53:00.000-08:00

Dear Readers-

Everyone writes something cool for their 100th blog post.

I guess I just don't know what to write about. So, I will say this.

I think the greatest thing I have learned in my life is that my life is NOTHING without the people who are a part of it.

Whether the people are family, friends, Deity, leaders, followers, helpers, trials, whatever; my life is made and broken and remade by people.

I love people. I guess I am definitely a people person.

Thank you people; I love you. You make my life as good as a glass of Ovaltine and Ramen noodles. Only better.

Love,
Pumpkin

16 daze until...

2010-12-08T14:30:00.000-08:00

16 dayz til ->

momma food
homemade pumpkin pie
russian teacakes
jelly filled cookies
tuffy
binx
momma kitty
queensized bed
christmas movie marathons
our amazing christmas tree
lots of time with family
my red truck
snow
starlite
burger west
jack in the box
sleeping in
gym time at my old high school
sledding down the sand dunes
and presents

give it to me baby uh huh uh huh

2 dolla bill

2010-12-06T00:44:00.000-08:00

Whatever happened to Thomas Jefferson's America? His America fits better with what I'd like to do with my life...

Instead, I get to play the game, become part of the machine, and hope that I get to do what I enjoy, learn what I want to learn and practice what I want to practice, all while I bump and grind.

Bring it.

Serenaded

2010-12-02T22:28:00.000-08:00

Once upon an evening, a man wanted to serenade a lady.

So, he did.

My buddy TomTom had the guts to buy a rose, practice up some songs on the guitar and deliver that rose and those songs to a special lady.

To some this feat may seem ordinary. But, to those who truly know what it takes to strum a guitar in freezing cold weather, with nothing but a wing and a prayer for hope that she won't shoot ya down, this feat is everything but ordinary.

Nice job TomTom. You inspire us all.

You're basically the new Batman.

Going somewhere and doing something

2010-11-28T20:58:00.000-08:00

That's what my brother said today on the phone a half hour before he got on his plane and left until spring. Hopefully I can email him.

I'm glad I have my lil' brother Ian and Bobo. I know I can text them with women/life/work out problems and that they will answer.

I hope Christopher can email.

I worry about his wife and Travis and Shelby. Tricia said Shelby misses her daddy a lot and loves being able to Skype. Travis misses Chris cause he does guy stuff and is a good step-dad.

He is a good dad. And brother. And never makes time for himself. He lives selflessly. And that's why he does whatever it is he does.

I hope I can be like him someday.

Snow

2010-11-21T12:44:00.000-08:00

Last night we all walked out of Whitney's cabin and it had SNOWED. And the snow had covered the grass. And it happened while we were inside and we all had no idea.

So... I would have to say with that event, and the fact that Thanksgiving is this week, I will now allow myself to be excited for Christmas.

And, today I'm allowing myself to listen to Christmas.

Scrooge is gone!

Moving on out

2010-11-21T00:14:00.000-08:00

I FINALLY SOLD MY CONTRACT AND I AM MOVING OUT OF MY OLD APARTMENT AND INTO MY NEW CONDO!!!

If you would like a tour, click here and then here.

It is cheaper, nicer and I get my own room until January.

I'll be in by Wednesday. Happy Turkey Day to me.

4

2010-11-15T11:13:00.000-08:00

4 years and about forty five minutes ago, I went into the MTC and was officially a missionary on his way to Detroit...

First, where the crap did the last 4 years go? Wasn't high school that long?

Second, what the crap am I DOING with my life?

Last, what the crap do I WANT to do with my life?

DOING: I am going to school.

WANT: Find a woman that will put up with me, be done with school, get a bomb job, have kids, get my Ph.D.

I think that works.

I feel old.

The place I cannot shake, no matter what...

2010-11-03T15:39:00.000-07:00

First, open a new tab and listen to THIS song while you read this for the full effect. Do it.

We all have places in our lives that mean a little more to us than other places do. These places bring fond memories, good smells, familiar routines and even a rise of blood pressure due to excitement of being in such a favorite place.

I have a few of these places, including old used bookstores, a quiet street at night that has just been blanketed with new snow, the middle of the desert, the ghetto of Detroit...

But, one place stands out more than the others. This place is where I grew up. This place has larger than life sunsets, summers that turn the twilight into a hue of pink and makes sidewalks stay warm long after the sun has gone down and emits a smell of wet sagebrush that binds the soul to earth. This place has my family, all of my family. This place is where I learned what it means to have the same friends since birth. This place has the Starlite Cafe after football games, corndogs and curly fries during fair week, yelling cattle on Wednesdays, branding in the fall and so much more.

This place is Eastern Oregon. And I love it.

Look at these pictures.

I have to go back and visit this place at least twice a year. I have to see my family, eat my mom's food, smell my grandma, hear my grandpa laugh, go and touch stuff in my dad's garage, drive the loop in town, see a sunset, get hugs from those I love, eat a Ranch Hand at Burger West, have some pie at Starlite and do a 32 mile round trip midnight run to Jack in the Box with my brother. I have to or I cannot function.

I have no idea why this is. I suppose that somehow in my creation the molecules of my body were mixed with the molecules of this place.

I will never be able to live there again because... I don't want to. It doesn't suffice a place in which my dreams can come true. But, I will forever be connected. Maybe someday this place will grow and be able to support what I want for my life.

I hope it doesn't, though. If it did, then this place wouldn't be what it is.

And then I would be lost.

El regalo en mi puerta

2010-11-03T10:04:00.001-07:00

Yesterday was a pretty nast day. Until I came home from weights class.

I got home and my roommate Adam told me that there had been an envelope tucked into the door and that it was on the kitchen table.

I went and picked it up. It simply had my first name on the front and nothing else. So I opened it. Inside was a post it note that said FOR GAS.

And also inside was $40...

Um... surprise? YES. I have no idea who this/these person/persons was.

I don't know how they knew that I needed the money. I don't like to tell people about my college kid finances. But, somehow, this/these person/persons knew what was up.

I really want to thank them.

Also, this was the only way this person could have helped me out because I am too prideful to have taken the money on my own accord. That being said, I really, really need to work on being humble and allowing people to help me.

Thanks if you read this. And if you read this and know who did it, please thank them for me.

Now it is time to tip back some OJ and go make some frames for some art... Ya for Wednesdee.

Gift

2010-11-02T18:16:00.000-07:00

I came home from school today. On my door was an envelope with forty bucks in it with a note that said FOR GAS.

That's all.

I have NO IDEA who did it.

But, if it was you, thank you.

I love you. I hope you know what this did for me this week.

Tunes

2010-10-26T01:15:00.001-07:00

Songs I is be likin WAY too much right now:

Still by Matt Nathanson. Listen to it here.

Lyrics:

I remember hearts that beat yeah, yeah
I remember you and me,yeah, oh yeah
Tangled in hotel sheets
You wore me out
You wore me out

I remember honey lips and words so true
I remember nonstop earthquake dreams of you
You're coming on fast like good dreams do
All night long

CHORUS:
Still can feel you kiss me love
Still can see your brown skin shine, shine
Still can feel you kiss me love
Come on and drive me wild (me wild)

And you move like water, yeah
And you broke like waves
I've never been deeper, so far gone
Your sister in the next room with the television on

CHORUS

I remember hearts that beat,yeah
I remember you and me
Tangled in hotel sheets (for hours)

CHORUS

Still can feel you kiss me love
Still can see your eyes like diamonds, diamonds
Memories are strong enough
To come on and drive me wild
Come on and drive me wild

Headlights by The Classic Crime. Listen to it here.

Lyrics:

A summer drive away from dying: a broken heart nothing to lose
I know it hurts so bad just trying to please the ones you hate to love
And I wrote this note about someone I used to know
So I'd remember how life can be so short when your left alone to wonder
How it is someone opens and shuts the door

I know your cold but come home
It's a shame how short we all have come

You set your mind on cruise control; knuckles grip the wheel in fear to let it go
Love is empty, love is cruel, love it blindly breaks the rules
How could you have been a fool?
It's something all of us go through
You choke back tears and swallow lies but those wiper blades won't fix you eyes,
count on having clouded vision for at least a little while

And I know you're cold but come home: it's a shame how short we all have come
And I know you're cold but come home

Please don't face the headlights of the oncoming cars along
We wont forget the past
We wont forget the past. (And I know you're cold)
Say all the answers and I will let you go
I wont look back
and I wont look back
Say all the answers
and I will let you go
I will let you go
I will let you go

Say all the answers and I will let you go
I won't look back
I won't look back

Please don't face the headlights of the oncoming cars along
and I will let you go

Lost Year by MuteMath. Listen to it here.

Lyrics:

Hold on to the way we started
How it all should have gone
Somewhere love was disregarded
And it all came undone undone

CHORUS
'cause nothing's a breeze we suffer we bleed
For two hearts to beat as one
We learn as we go at least now we know
Something we can't become become

If a talk could really solve this
What are we fighting for?
Words hurt more than they arm us
Don't say anymore anymore

CHORUS

Oh for a year we were strong and courageous
But we lost it somehow
Oh if there was something that could have saved us
We'd have found it by now

Nothing's a breeze we suffer we bleed
For two hearts to beat as one
We learn as we go but at least now we know
Something we can't become become

There's no luck in our lives
No living under starlight no sight in your eyes
To keep us from running around in circles anymore
Oh oh oh oh oh oh oh oh

Hold on to the way we started
How it all should have gone

Yesm. Good chocolate.

1:59 am

2010-10-26T00:57:00.000-07:00

I hate admitting when I need help.

I hate it when I can't be the tough guy that everyone can rely on all the time.

Oh wellz.

Humility ya?

Ya.

Precipitation

2010-10-25T00:22:00.000-07:00

I love that it is raining.

For some reason, knowing that I can share the enjoyment of a rainy and cloudy day with someone, even though I can't have them around right now, makes everything fine.

I want it to keep raining.

Watch and learn

2010-10-18T14:55:00.000-07:00

I really like THIS song right now. And I really like THIS commercial. And THIS one.

Get inspired and do it.

445 is not an 87

2010-10-06T06:47:00.000-07:00

I got up at 5 ish this morning. Couldn't sleep anymore. Oh well. I got up, got ready and got out the door. It was raining! I was so excited. I love the rain. I went to the gas station, grabbed a water, a monster and a poppyseed and drove up to campus. I drove cause I knew I would get a parking stop being so early. Then I sat in front of the library until it opened. Now I'm in the basement and have it all to myself. It is glorious. I've already been able to get loads done.

Ya me.

KIMBALL

2010-09-30T23:41:00.001-07:00

My buddy Rob and his band finally got their finished song back.

It is amazing to say the least. You can download it for free HERE.

It is called 'The Ivory'.

Get ready to be addicted.

Black Balloon

2010-09-25T00:13:00.000-07:00

Tonight I played guitar for the first time in front of a crowd since I was like 17. I played bass. My buddy Rob and I played Black Balloon by The Goo Goo Dolls. We tweaked it to the way we liked it.

To say the least, I loved it. I need to do it more often.

How did I forget about all this stuff I used to love to do but stopped doing?

No idea.

I guess we all do it.

Things like longboarding, gym time, jammin, women hunting and whatever else remind me that, yes, I am in school and I have responsibilities for the future. But, I need to remember that other things make me who I am and happy, and that planning and living for the future is not the only way for me to find happiness.

Bueno and a half. Great night. Great find.

And she smelled way good, too.

Tew

2010-09-19T12:46:00.000-07:00

2 years.

Are long but short.

Hard yet easy.

Worth it but sometimes hard to see it for both sides of the coin.

Lots of change yet no change at all.

Confusing and also steady.

Prepared for nothing really but to step into the shadows and hope to be guided.

Courage with huge helpings of humility.

Serving oneself by forgetting about oneself.

Beautiful and ugly.

Simple and complicated.

A dazzling 5000 piece puzzle that takes forever to fit together, yet in the end fits perfectly.

2 years.

The best 2 years.

For both sides of the coin.

Texting

2010-09-13T00:43:00.000-07:00

It is 1:43 in the am. I just got done making my list of all the homework stuff I need to do before Monday is over. It is all the homework I need to get done for the whole week.

And here I am blogging and talking to my friend Rochelle on effbook.

And listening to my tunes.

And also wondering...

Wednesday I am having heart surgery. It isn't a huge surgery where they crack my chest open or anything. It is just an ablation which they can do intravenously. I go in at 10 am and most likely will be home that night. It does involve burning a part of my heart, and that is kinda scary. But cool, too. I have never had surgery like this before. It is total unfamiliar territory. And when it is all done, my heart will be fixed. HAPPY BIRFDAY TO ME!

And I'm also thinking about all the blessings I have been given lately. Ones that top the list: a buddy that I can workout with everyday, count on to be my wingman and someone who helps me live a higher standard; roommates that are kinda dirty, but HILARIOUS, and I really don't know what I would do without the added laughs that they bring me on a daily basis; crazy girlies who come over and eat my food and flirt with my roommates and make life DA BEST; texting so I can stay close to my bruddas who are near and far; parents who drop what they're doing to take care of me, make sure that they know I'm invited to their family shotgun shoots and want my number so they can text me every once in a while to make sure I'm doing well; prayer; inspired leaders; and TON more.

They're isn't enough space and time.

I am blessed. That is all there is too it. I wish I knew how I could really thank Him for all of them. Maybe someday I will figure that out.

303

2010-08-28T22:14:00.001-07:00

Friday I got on a plane and flew to Colorado for the first time ever.

And it has been awesome.

Amazing people, amazing food, amazing activities.

And I got to go to a Rockies game. And they won.

Tomorrow Neal will give his talk, which he is writing tonite (which is the only way to write a farewell talk).

Then, I'll get on a plane for Utah, school will start the next day, along with my new job, and I have no idea what I am going to do.

I guess I just have to jump in and hopefully swim better than a nutta butta does.

Ring it

2010-08-25T22:23:00.000-07:00

Tonight after my gym time I ran my favorite run. I leave the gym and run up the road that goes between the condos at Condo Row, past JDawgs, up the hill and around the back of the Testing Center and between the Maeser building, past the Gordon B. Hinckley building, up to the Bell at the Marriott Center, over to the Bell Tower, down the stairs, through Heritage Halls, always passing by Rogers 93 expecting to see blue paper on the walls with tags of all sorts of inappropriateness, and finally down the hill back behind Kiwanis Park and then I finish at my apartment. Basically, it is a big loop that hits a lot of my favorite spots on campus/off campus.

But, tonight was a little different.

When I got up to the Bell by the Marriott Center, I stopped. Sometimes I ring the bell, but only because it is fun. Tonight, though, I read the plaque that rests at the base of the Bell, or, the Y Bell. Apparently during BYU's history there have been four Y Bells. The first was brought across the plains by the pioneers. The one we have now has been around since before WWII. It has been vandalized, cracked and fixed, stolen and recovered. Today, it symbolizes the Spirit of the Y and the dedication of the students at BYU.

And that is when it happened. When I got to that last part, ringing the Y Bell had an entirely different meaning. For me, ringing the Y Bell was a call for myself to remember what the Spirit of the Y is to me, and to remember to be dedicated to my studies. That dedication to my studies will benefit my future family, and benefitting my future family is the number one reason for why I do ANYTHING that I do today.

While I walked up to the Bell Tower, I was full of immense gratitude. I was full of gratitude for the Atonement, the beauty of this earth, my life, the special people in my life that I have depended upon and those same people that have in turn depended upon me, and so much more. The Sprit of the Y is brotherhood in the priesthood. It is family. It is kindness. It is hard work. It is dedication. It is going farther than you feel you can go. It is pushing. It is moving. It is shaking. It is love.

When I rang that bell, I was ringing it for all of those in my life who have cultivated this special Y Spirit in my life, even before I got here at BYU. I was ringing it for me, for my family, for Rogers 93, for all my residents I have served, for my friends, for all my people back in Detroit, even my old life and friends back in Vale. I was ringing it for all of those who cannot ring it themselves. It was a call for me, for those who know they should, and even those who don't know they should, to remember the Spirit of Humanity, and to be dedicated in making that Spirit of Humanity thrive.

That Bell is special. Ringing it is almost sacred. I love that Bell.

I had a good run, to say the least.

And I've decided my shower was made for people who are way shorter than six feet tall.

Ready?

2010-08-19T13:05:00.000-07:00

Today it rained. And there was thunder. And lightening. It was awesome. I love weather like that.

I also got my entire apartment packed and ready to move for tomorrow. I am not the least bit sad about leaving Heritage and my job, and this past two weeks or so has helped with that. Nuff said.

I can't wait for this fall to start. Ya, there are parts that are gonna suck, but as time goes on, it will be really good. New place, new routine, old friends home, new friends back in Provo and a new job to look forward to.

I think having to work in Heritage has been a hindrance to me looking forward instead of back so much. I live in the same place I did when I had my roommates around, and having to stay in the same place and have them gone has sucked and made it hard to not dwell on them being not around.

And that has helped me to dread fall, cause having them gone but expecting them to be around when I get home from class is gonna suck.

And I think I am even closer to being excited for fall since I have started writing this blog than I was when I started.

But first I want to go camping.

In the airport with my drank...

2010-08-11T06:23:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting here in the airport looking at gobs of missionaries who are waiting to ride their planes to their various destinations.

I am excited for them!

Some are talking on the pay phones to family/girly friends/friends.

Some are eating some food.

Some are sitting quietly.

All of them are wet behind the ears.

All of them have no idea what awaits them.

All of them are here and going and doing anyway.

I miss Detroit.

I miss my residents.

I miss my roommates.

The sun is in my eyes so it makes crying seem more legitimate, just in case that happens...

Brudda

2010-08-09T20:56:00.000-07:00

This is my older brother.

He is pretty much da bomb. I wish we could have grown up closer to each other. We have different moms. He grew up in California with his mom because Vale was too small for him; I don't blame him.

Christopher has always been around since I can remember. Since I was little, he always came up for the summer and we went camping and rode dirt bikes and stuff like that. He taught me about girls and always had good music playing in his car.

One day he got into a fight at school and ended up having to go to the hospital because of a concussion; this was right before he left and went back to live with his mom. I remember my parents going over with him. I couldn't sleep at all. When he got home, the first thing he did was come downstairs to our room and crawl into my bed and told me that he was fine and answered all of my stupid little kid questions about what happened and what they did to him at the hospital. He didn't get mad or impatient; he just answered my questions and made sure I was okay and then I fell asleep. Then he left. And it sucked. And I didn't understand.

He graduated from high school and went into the Navy. He has spent a lot of time in Iraq. I am so friggin proud of him. He is an AMAZING example and I am really grateful for him.

Nowadays, he is married to a really neat gal and has a very talented stepson that can surf and a daughter that is THE CUTEST THING ON THE PLANET. I have yet to meet any of them, but I will here pretty quick! Hopefully...

Here are some pics as of late:

In all of them, this is what I see: my brother, a father and a husband, being patient, teaching by showing, providing by doing and loving by giving.

He really, really does a perfect job of showing me what I need to do when I get to that point, one of these days.

Rock on brosef. Do it to it.

Birfday for da Big HP

2010-07-31T22:01:00.000-07:00

My buddy Weston texted me on Tuesday or Wednesday and decided to come and visit. He came down Thursday. We partayed.

Weston and I have been buds since 6th grade. He is hilarious, a great example about how to be healthy and work hard and to do work. Every time we get together we PARTAY it up, whether it is downtown Boise or rockin it in the 84604, and shiz gets DONE.

Some one worded highlights will have to suffice as to what we did: triple date, Iron Chef, state capital, Temple Square, pizza, Conference Center, fancy dessert, Beerhive Pub, pool, lesbians, Utah brews, Murphy's, Keys on Main, tributes to Gary Kamo, Shucks, Twilight Lounge, Mike, Troy, Ashlee and friends, Combos and late night drives home.

Don't worry faithful blog readers, I made good choices and remembered who I was.

But, I still had a damn good time doing it.

PWNED.

Library books

2010-07-27T23:53:00.001-07:00

Some neat things have happened in the past few days.

I got a job for the fall that pays pretty well, and will be a lot of fun to work at. I bought my plane tickets for Colorado. I was put on medication, medication that I will take for the rest of my life. I learned some very special, personal and meaningful traits of my amazing coworkers. I remembered the importance of friends. I have one roommate left as of today that has not left on his mission. I keep learning that missing people never stops. I realized that being hasty is only about 90% of the time bad. Dr. Pepper never, ever gets old. I can't wait to go camping with my cousin and some of my buds. The BYU library has some books I want to read.

And I just got a kick butt email that pretty much pwns everything.

SVT

2010-07-26T19:00:00.000-07:00

Today I went to the ER.

My heart was out of rhythm, which is a normal thing for me. I went to my cardiologist a month ago. He had me wear this heart monitor, and the whole time I was wearing it, my heart never went out. So, today, so he could have a record of my heart problem, I went to the ER to get an EKG.

This was my experience:

I drive down and park at the ER entrance. I walk in. Then... I have to wait in line. For five minutes. Not too long, but the entire time I'm waiting I'm wondering if my heart is going to go back into rhythm, and thus my entire trip will be wasted.

When it is my turn, I have to give a ton of information to the lady at the desk. Then... I have to wait. I wait ten minutes for it to be my turn.

By this point, I was annoyed. I wasn't annoyed at my having to wait; I was annoyed at the process I was being subject to.

What happens when someone is bleeding profusely? What if someone has a broken leg? What if someone has an eyeball hanging out of the socket? And in my case, what if my heart is beating 200+ beats per minute and at any second it is going to go back into rhythm, without me having the episode recorded, making my cardiologist have to wait before he can decide how to fix me because he doesn't have a recorded episode?

After it is my turn, and they hook me up, the nurse's eyes get REALLY big when she realizes that my heart is beating so fast and in such an irregular rhythm. This is about the hundredth or so time this has happened to me, so I'm used to it. I'm there simply to get it all recorded for my cardiologist. She sends me right back to triage. They hook me up. I get oxygen. I get an IV. I get recorded. My cardiologist prescribes medicine. My goal of a recorded episode is complete.

But... I am pretty aghast about the process I went through. I know that many people do not have insurance, people that DO need care. And I know that hospitals eat A LOT of costs for those who end up not paying their bills. And I know that somehow those extra costs hospitals have to pay need to be kept at a strong minimum. But... I don't think a person who has a broken leg, a bleeding member or a hanging eyeball should have to wait in line to sign in, and then wait in line to get treatment, all to save money.

And yet... I have no idea how to fix the process/problem/etc. Is the answer Obamacare? Is the answer to have medical care as unto Canada? ...I'm not sure. I know there are positives to what we have now and to what are proposed as changes.

The sad thing is, after about a week, I probably won't care again until I have to go back, or have a similar experience, or a family member/friend has a similar experience.

All I know is that the way I was given care was far from my idea of how I thought it should have happened.

Lets watch Scrubs.

Barnyard

2010-07-21T23:00:00.000-07:00

Sometimes plans turn into barnes that are on fire, specifically during the part of the fire when the roof caves in.

Fridee Nite

2010-07-16T21:59:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, when I have to work Friday nights, I want to quit my job.

Friday nights are for hanging out doing list items with your girlfriend. Or swimming in her pool. And stuff like that.

Friday nights are for hanging out with your buds. And even though most of mine are gone, minus Kela and Jowanza, Friday nights are still for hanging out with your buds.

But, I'm here, organizing office space. Answering phone calls. Putting linen frames.

But it is okay. Cause I'm getting paid. Right? Right... Ish...

In-N-Out in t-minus una hora.